"Since I don't hate it here, I can be picky …" – Excerpt from associate in Big Law commenting on Subreddit Big Law post about if it is possible to be "happy" in Big Law. Here is that thread.
Of the 137 responses which came in, that one seems to be the most insightful and useful. Too many of the comments seem to take pride in the amount of antipathy they feel about the jobs in Big Law. In itself, unlike the associate who indicates the option to be picky, that creates a sense of desperation which, in turn, stimulates urgency, which can trigger bad decision-making.
In doing intuitive coaching with professionals I have observed this: The intensity of the hostility toward the job situation isn't aligned with reality. The hatred has taken on a life of its own. Once that antipathy is decoupled from what really is, two courses of action are possible:
- Change your head around and reset. Yes, staying is possible.
- Calmly and strategically search for an alternate.
The power of hatred to distort reality, of course, is not restricted to professional life. A retired lawyer I intuitively coached relocated from Newark, New Jersey to Phoenix, Arizona. After a few months she "hated" Phoenix. When she stopped hating Phoenix she came to like it. She is putting down roots in that southwestern city.
EXERCISE: Ask yourself how you would handle the challenges of a job if you hadn't decided you hated it. You might find that with such an intense emotion out of the way you can conjure up creative coping skills.
Intuitive Career Coaching. Worth a try. Complimentary Consultation [email protected] or text 203-468-8579.